


Edification

by blessedharlot, Riakomai



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Art, Bottom Bucky Barnes, Bucky Barnes as Captain America, Bucky!Cap, Cunnilingus, Dildos, F/M, Fellatio, Fluff and Smut, Hair Pulling, Pegging, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Post-Civil War (Marvel), Shower Sex, Top Natasha Romanov, canon compliant through Civil War, explicit art
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-29
Updated: 2017-05-29
Packaged: 2018-11-02 18:43:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10950492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blessedharlot/pseuds/blessedharlot, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Riakomai/pseuds/Riakomai
Summary: “Do you remember what you asked me about, that night? What you were curious about trying?”“Oh,” James said. His eyes widened a bit, then he gave a nervous smile. “Yes.”“Are you still curious about it?”She could tell he took the question seriously, but he only had to think a moment or two. “Yes,” he said solemnly. “I want to try. With you.”She gave him a satisfied smile.“Then look in that drawer over there.”His gaze followed where she was pointing, then he looked back at her hesitantly. As he gave her foot one last squeeze, curiosity began to spread across his face. He got up to investigate.She enjoyed her view of him crossing the room. His back muscles shifted as he opened the drawer, and there was a subtle lift of his torso as he drew in a sharp breath.She had gotten him three silicone dildos of varying sizes. All were fire engine red.“Pick out which one you want to try,” she commanded.-=-=-=-=-=-After a hard day of superheroing, Nat has some plans to help Bucky relax.





	Edification

**Author's Note:**

> Art by [riakomai](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Riakomai/pseuds/Riakomai) and fic by [blessedharlot](http://archiveofourown.org/users/blessedharlot)! This collaboration is a part of the 2017 Captain America Reverse Big Bang.
> 
> This story takes place a year or two after the events in _Captain America: Civil War_.

They each hauled their own gear back to the apartment in discreet bags. Nat could tell from James’ silent, stiff slouch in front of her that he still felt anger and disappointment.

Being a vigilante Captain America wasn’t easy, she supposed.

He rattled the keys a bit too much, threw their front door open a bit too heavily, and dropped his bags down haphazardly in the hallway before heading sullenly to the shower.

She barely had the front door closed before her phone rang.

“Hey,” she answered.

“You two alright?” Steve began, solicitously.

“Yeah, we’re fine,” Nat said off-handedly. “And no matter what the rumors are, there were no casualties. The mission went well enough.”

“Good. How is he?”

“Grumpy. And terse.” She hesitated to ask, but decided she’d rather know than be in the dark. “Have you heard anything on your end?”

“Nothing much.”

“Steve.”

“Well. There are... whispers of another replacement.”

“Ah,” she said. “That would explain a few things. Tony’s tired of the interloper, then? He’s ready to have a legitimate, registered Captain America?”

“I’m not sure Tony is the driving force on this one,” Steve sighed.

“C’mon Steve. I know you want to be gracious. But you know it galls him that James has taken this on himself, and that he actually has a lot of the public behind him.”

“Yes, but Tony also recognizes that Buck’s doing some good. And he probably doesn't lose sleep worrying over his welfare. But like I said, I don't think this is coming from Tony.”

“Then who’s gunning for him?”

It sounded to her like Steve took a moment to measure his words. “Natasha. Not everybody’s ready for a renegade Captain America. I didn’t exactly build my reputation on being a free agent. This is uncharted territory. It’s.. it’s weird. And a lot of people don’t want weird when they’re scrambling for a sense of safety.” Steve took a breath. “And these recent incidents that look like missteps and mistakes on Bucky's part-”

“Those weren’t his fault! Steve, listen to me, he’s doing a fantastic job with this.”

“Nat, I know that. Of course I do. But they weren’t ideal PR moments for a rogue, anonymous Captain America either. That’s my only point here. You’re asking why his legitimacy is being questioned. I’m telling you. When you’re not so swayed by your own heart’s desire, you know how public perception functions as well as I do.”

Nat could hear the rueful smile in his voice. She felt herself getting defensive on James’ behalf.

“The public, as a whole,” she began, “has been ridiculous and fickle, far beyond any reasonable level of distrust through this whole damn thing. There’s always going to be naysayers, Steve. What the hell is he supposed to do?”

“Personally? I want him to keep doing exactly what he’s doing. I’m proud of him. You know that, right?”

Nat took a breath and tried not to snap at Steve again. “I do know that. I am too. Obviously,” she chuckled mirthlessly as she ran a hand through her hair.

They were silent for a beat.

“I’m going to go tend to his frustration,” she said. “And my own fatigue. We’ll figure the rest of this out some other time.”

“Good plan. Tend to each other. Get some rest and relaxation in. Maybe come visit? Tomorrow afternoon?”

“Deal.” She hung up and sat her phone down.

Nat peeled off every stitch of her gear and left it in a heap in the bedroom.

She moved gently into the bathroom, which was already filled with steam. She pulled the shower curtain aside, to find James standing stock still under the beating showerhead, his gleaming arm bracing him against the wall. His face was crestfallen.

She climbed in next to him.

“This was a ridiculously bad idea,” he called above the sound of the water.

“Oh, my love,” she said gently, putting her palm to his cheek.

“I knew Steve made it look easy when it wasn’t,” he muttered, as he shook his head. “But this job… it isn’t just about fighting. It’s about… diplomacy. Politics. Speeches and winning people over and looking… pure,” he groaned. “And being liked.”

“A lot of people are rooting for you,” she smiled gingerly.

“Maybe,” he mumbled. “If they don’t know who I really am.”

She raised an eyebrow and turned his face toward hers. “A lot of people love the new Cap, precisely because they know - in their hearts - exactly who he is.”

James clearly tried to hide his skepticism, but he couldn’t quite completely ignore his impulse to roll his eyes. He’d done a lot of scoffing and eye rolling on the trip home, as Nat tried to reason with him that things weren’t so bad. That he was just a little demoralized. That this gig wasn’t over yet - that this would blow past and he could keep doing this thing he loved so much - helping people. Anonymously. Through Steve’s legacy.

But he wasn’t ready to hear much of that.

She decided then that instead of continuing to argue, she would distract him.

She got his attention by sliding up close, and running her fingertips down his organic arm. When he responded by raising his head toward her a bit, she moved in and pressed her whole body into his.

Their embrace was a perfect puzzle of overlapping geographies, place calling to place. The way his hand found her tailbone, so the crook of his arm could press her hip into his. The way the curve of his jaw met her collarbone. The arc of her arm wrapped around his head just so. Her other hand traced the lines of his arm plates. Her breasts rested against his pecs. Stomach to stomach, shoulders softened and folded together.

Some folks made a home of family heirlooms and worn furniture and old books. This home was made of muscle and scars, flesh that rested by joining itself together. It was the nooks and crannies that made up a home.

Nat leaned back to reach the soap, as James never took his eyes off her face. She rubbed the bar between her hands, and then she began lathering him up.

First she stroked his chest, up and down. She reached around his tender flank, and finally wound around to soap up his organic arm. Then she slowly crouched down and ran her hands down each leg. When she moved her way back up to standing, her hands lingered between his legs, fingers carefully stroking his balls. When she brushed the tips of her fingers down the seam just behind, he closed his eyes. His heavy expression finally started to crack and let in the corner of a grin.

As she pulled her hand away, James wouldn’t let her get far. In one gesture he again pressed Nat close to him and took the bar from her hand. He wrapped his soapy self around her, using his own chest to lather up hers and winding his slick arms and hands over every other surface of her that he could reach.

He finally slid himself slowly down her front, his chin landing on her mound. His frown returned as he came eye level with her pussy, where there was a foamy obstacle in his way. Nat wondered for a split second whether the probably-unpleasant-tasting soap would deter him at all. He did in fact stop, and scowl, as he looked back up her face. She couldn’t help but grin at his silliness. Then he grabbed both her thighs and pulled, forcing her to take a step into the running water. Had he not rocked way back on his haunches, she would be straddling his face. As it was, he closed his eyes tight to the cascade of water - much of it soapy - now pouring across her abdomen and his face. She had to laugh at his impromptu, and flawed, plan.

But James remained undeterred. As soon as the soap was out of his way, he pressed his face between her legs, using his leverage to push them both back outside the stream of water. Once he could easily breathe, he began enjoying himself.

Nat tilted her hips forward and brought herself to her full height, brushing her hair back away from her face. She took a deep breath in, and gave herself a few moments to enjoy the happy explorations of his tongue. She relaxed, and grinned.

And then she pulled his face away, and pulled him back to his feet.

“I have other plans. We should finish our shower.”

He looked at her curiously, and then hungrily. He let her reach for the shampoo, and held her close as they washed each others’ hair.

James remained dedicated to nuzzling around their newest showering obstacles. Only her occasional nose wrinkling and turning away kept them from kissing through smears of unappetizing moisturizers and artificial papaya scent.

“You are nothing if not persistent, my love.”

“But I looooove you.”

James tried to catch her for a kiss while he had a streak of conditioner smeared across his lips.

“Bleh!” she replied, pushing him away.

“God, you’re romantic!” he cried in mock ecstasy.

“Alright. We’ve clearly accomplished all we’re going to accomplish here.” They were mostly washed up... and he’d gotten some of his fatigue and frustration washed away. That part of Nat’s mission was complete.

They rinsed themselves off.

Then she turned off the water as James climbed out. Soon he was toweling off his hair, wandering naked back into the bedroom without her.

She got her own towel and followed him, only to realize he wasn’t in the bedroom at all anymore. A bit puzzled, she took the opportunity to reach into a drawer and pull out her favorite soft black sports bra.

James re-entered the bedroom with determination, guzzling one of two giant bottles of sports drink in his hands. He stopped in surprise when he saw her pulling her bra on.

“Clothes?” His frown was back.

“Hold on. I haven’t told you what we’re doing yet.”

He grinned and climbed onto the bed, traveling toward her on his knees.

“So impatient,” she said, as she moved to meet him.

“I told you, I’m lovestruck. Catch up. Why are you wearing clothes?” he pouted.

She sunk both of her hands into his hair and gripped it firmly enough to get a little gasp from him. Nat pulled his face back and kissed him deeply. They lingered there, stirring up that deep thrumming inside.

She pulled away and watched his bliss face - relaxed jaw, furrowed brow, drunken smile - until he opened his eyes and looked at her.

“It’s been a long day,” Nat said. “I need a foot rub.”

She fell backwards onto a bed pillow and propped her feet up in front of her.

James grinned, and repositioned. Nat dipped into the nearest nightstand drawer -- they’d long since learned not to cover too many apartment surfaces with items that they’d just knock around the next time they had sex. She found some lotion and handed it to him. He ran his fingers up her calves, then took the bottle from her.

“Definitely a long day,” he agreed, gazing at her legs and rubbing lotion into her feet.

“Do you want to talk about it?” she asked.

He closed his eyes and shook his head, savoring the work he was doing wringing tension out of her foot.

“Good. I’ve got better things for us to do.”

Without lifting his head, he peeked through a curtain of damp hair with a delightfully charming leer.

Nat admired the look of him for a moment, then reached back into the drawer for a hair tie, and launched into her plan.

“Do you remember a few weeks ago,” she said, “when I showed you my longtime favorite dildo?”

“The steel one?” he grinned wide. “Vividly.”

She laughed a quiet, nose-wrinkly laugh. “That makes you so happy.”

“That I permanently influenced your masturbation habits?” he snorted. “I’m thrilled. It’s one of the greatest things I’ve ever done in my life.”

“Well, it was certainly a beautiful gift to me.”

“You’re welcome,” James snickered.

Nat pulled her foot away and leaned forward. She softly caressed James’ hair away from his face, as he gazed into her eyes. She smoothed his hair back into a quick bun, fastening it with the tie.

Then she gripped the clump of hair hard, wrenching his head toward her, so his neck was bared to her. She sunk her teeth quickly into the tender flesh, and felt his pulse quicken as he groaned in pleasure.

Then she let go of him, and slowly leaned back again. As he softly panted, she gave him her other foot.

James licked his lips, took hold of her foot and began working it between his hands.

She continued. “But there’s another part of the conversation that night I want to talk about.”

“Okay.”

“Do you remember what you asked me about? What you were curious about trying?”

“Oh,” James said. His eyes widened a bit, then he gave a nervous smile. “Yes.”

“Are you still curious about it?”

She could tell he took the question seriously, but he only had to think a moment or two. “Yes,” he said solemnly. “I want to try. With you.”

She gave him a satisfied smile.

“Then look in that drawer over there.”

His gaze followed where she was pointing, then he looked back at her hesitantly. As he gave her foot one last squeeze, curiosity began to spread across his face. He got up to investigate.

She enjoyed her view of him crossing the room. His back muscles shifted as he opened the drawer, and there was a subtle lift of his torso as he drew in a sharp breath.

She had gotten him three silicone dildos of varying sizes. All were fire engine red.

“Pick out which one you want to try tonight,” she commanded.

He looked back at her, mouth a bit agape and eyes sparkling. He was clearly taking in her surprise as something big and nervous and exciting.

While he weighed the different dildos in his hands, Nat went back to her dresser to get on her harness.

She held it in her hands, checking the straps and making adjustments, until James had selected a dildo and turned back to her. When she knew he was looking, she slipped her feet through the holes and slid the straps up her thighs. He was a fan of garter belts, so Nat wanted him to see the similar lines around her hips and thighs as she put it on. But even more than that, she wanted to be certain he saw the dildo on the inside of the harness, that would sit inside her as she wore it. James didn’t take his eyes off of her once as she slid the gear up into place and shifted the black insertable shaft between her legs.

She let a hum escape her lips, as she fastened the last buckle.

His eyes remained wide and his face was lit up, looking for all the world like a kid at the window of a candy store. He came close, and sheepishly handed to her what he’d chosen.

Nat first climbed up on the bed on her knees, then carefully threaded the dildo through the o-ring on the front of her harness. She leaned back, weighing the erect rod now strapped to her pelvis. Then she looked up to see what his response was.

She was delighted to see that he was now wearing what she thought of as his serious-mischief face - a determined jaw and a laser-focus on her, with a deep sparkle dancing in his eyes. He was clearly dedicated to having some fun now. He nearly drooled as he watched her shift her hips, the rod quivering, and his breath had sped up. He chewed his lower lip, crouched at the edge of the bed, filled with hunger, and looking unsure what he should do for her next.

“Come closer,” Nat ordered. “You know I only bite when you’ve earned it.”

He leaned closer, and she dug her fingers into his hair again - lovingly and very tightly. A gasp escaped his lips that delighted her. James looked so good with his neck muscles straining against her grip, his jawline on display for her, his eyes half closed in bliss and his breath ragged with desire.

His mouth reached for her cock and she gave him only enough slack to get close to it. His open mouth quivered near the head, his tongue eager to explore more.

“Do you want this?” she asked.

“Yes,” he gasped.

“Then ask for it,” she demanded.

“Please, m-may I suck your cock?”

“I can’t hear you.”

“Oh Jesus, Nat, please, I want your cock down my throat. Please. Please! Baby please, may I?”

She held him in place, and savored the tension of the moment down to her bones. The tease was still such a luxury for them... lingering in bed with all the time in the world. No one to stop them. Sitting in the hunger, letting it grow, knowing full well they could satisfy it any time they wanted, as often as they wanted.

Doing to him whatever she wanted to do. Whatever made them happy.

She let go of his hair, but said nothing. He remained still, waiting.

Nat smiled at his obedience.

“Do whatever you like,” she instructed.

His straining muscles immediately reached for satisfaction. His rough pink tongue reached the smooth red silicone, and a groan escaped his throat. He desperately brought the tip into his mouth, his breath heavy and his eyes shut. Nat leaned back and let him explore the new sensations at his own pace.

At first, he held just the tip in his mouth and sucked on it. Then he clearly found enjoyment twisting his head around, sucking from different angles. He wet his lips thoroughly and bobbed up and down, sliding the cock in and out. He tried long licks down the shaft, again showing her the warm softness of his lips and his tongue, contrasted against the cool firmness of the red silicone.

Nat found the sight of his naked form swallowing her cock to be breathtakingly beautiful.

He made a long, satisfied moan as he pulled back off a long suck. She waited until he just had the tip in his mouth, and then made a few short, gentle thrusts.

He made one of his happy gasps at that, and looked up at her pleadingly, without taking his mouth away from the cock.

So she did it again, stroking his hair as he held his head still and she thrust gently into his mouth.

She stopped after a few more thrusts, when his breath had gotten shallow and rapid with desire.

“Good boy,” she said spontaneously.

His eyes got wildly wide, and flitted up to her with some new light in them. He shivered, and pushed down to take her whole shaft into his mouth.

“Did you like being called a good boy?” Nat asked curiously.

He exhaled heavily into her harness and gulped air back in around her cock. A full body shiver gave way to a tiny, vigorous nod. Then he pulled up and dipped back down again and again.

“Ohhhh, my sweet boy!” Nat exclaimed. She licked her lips at this new information.

She gripped his hair again and pulled him off of her cock. His eyes and jaw searched wordlessly and hungrily. Nat leaned up and met his willing mouth with her own and they drank deep of each other.

Then she moved his head back to her cock, and he sucked greedily.

“Good boy. You’re so good at that!” She played gently with his hair as he worked, delighted to make him wonder when she might pull at it fiercely again.

 

 

“Good boy,” she continued. “So sweet, and so caring.”

James shivered again.

“You’re so careful and gentle. Do you like doing that for me?”

He slowed down only enough to nod and groan.

“Good,” Nat said. “That feels so good, keep doing that.”

She held his hair loosely and closed her eyes for a while, to enjoy the subtle currents of his ministrations echoing through her pelvis.

She opened her eyes and looked down at the beautiful sight. His body language got more and more eager as he worked.

“Do you want me inside you another way too?”

James stopped moving his head, though his coiled body was as tense with hunger as ever before. Soon he nodded clearly, but hesitated to do more. He kneeled there motionless.

“Then come here,” she said.

He gave one last suck as he brought himself up off her cock. He gasped for breath, and wet his lips with a slow, careful tongue. Then he looked at her a bit wild-eyed, and nervous again.

“My good boy,” Nat said firmly. James shivered again, and looked like he might cry. Then he reached for her and hugged her tightly, burying his face in her neck.

“You’re so tender, such a sweet boy.” She caressed his back and his head, and gave him a minute to gather himself, wrapped around her. They had clearly found something that resonated somewhere deep for him.

After a minute, his breath was steadier. James lifted his head just a bit, and she met his warm soft lips with hers.

Then one of her strokes changed to a tender, firm grasp on his hair again. She knew from experience and from his descriptions -- her having hold of him like that always took him to a wonderful soft edge of tension. He was instantly high, and relaxed. And usually ready for more.

“You still want more?”

“Yes please,” he moaned. “Thank you,” he said in a pleading voice. “Please.”

Nat smiled. “You are such a polite boy,” she praised. “Lay down on your back.”

James practically hopped to reposition himself, with a grin on his face again. She took a moment to marvel at his talent for simple silliness. Her skills at humor were sharper. His were soft and goofy and joyful.

He stretched back, unsure what to do with his hands until he put them nervously behind his head. She climbed between his legs and leaned in closer to him.

“Mmmm that’s a good boy,” she said, admiring his own cock, long since erect and dripping. She wrapped her fingers around his shaft and twisted up and down in a pattern she’d come to know well. Avoid the tip, press firmly. She had often kept him writhing in tense pleasure for hours doing this.

He rode a single, soft, open-mouthed moan for longer than Nat thought he could carry it, his hands now slowly clenching and unclenching at his side. Then he subtly arched his back and continued his ragged breathing.

“Fuck,” he said.

“That is correct,” she replied.

He giggled, and she could feel his laughter as twitches under her hand.

She let go, and straightened up to kneel between his legs. James had one knee propped up next to her, and she wrapped a hand around that thigh of his. She leaned her pelvis in to rest her cock next to his.

Nat let go a satisfied hum at the sight. James lifted himself up from his waist to look.

Their eyes met again.

“Do you want more?” she asked.

“Yes, please, God,” he replied.

“Get me lube.”

She nodded toward the nightstand nearby, and he quickly found the bottle in the drawer by its feel.

He poured the slippery liquid into his hand and groped for her cock, stroking it hard and fast. She held two fingers out to him and he dribbled lube across them too. He closed the bottle and tossed it aside so he could cradle her face with both hands.

And then Nat realized, he’d just put at least one streak of gooey lube in her clean hair.

She retaliated by grabbing his bottom lip with her teeth and biting it. He let out his beautiful whimper, and her hand snaked down past his cock and reached his ass.

She felt him tense up in anticipation, so she waited a few seconds. He soon relaxed again and she slid one finger inside him. He only got hungrier with that, relaxed and groaning, so she slid in another.

With that, James had to kiss her. His mouth was nothing but warm, wet hunger, and she had the sensation of him completely melting underneath her.

So she slid out her fingers, lined up her hips, and pressed the tip of her cock to where her fingers had just been. Soon she was deep inside him.

James let out a loud groan, and then inhaled with a gasp. He hung suspended on that breath, until he took another just like it. Nat held still where she was, and let him adjust to everything he was feeling. Soon both of his hands reached for her hips and he curled his head into her neck again.

So she started thrusting, slowly. And then her concentration and control was finally tested, as the angle of her thrust sent the most perfect strokes through her clit. She had a near overwhelming urge to grind far faster and deeper into him than the current situation called for.

She leaned back, and paused for a moment to catch her own breath.

“Oh my love, you’re such a good boy,” she gasped. He whimpered at her words again, which just made her want to caress every inch of him and say it a thousand times.

James reached for her hips and pulled her closer, eager to guide her thrusts deeper into him.

“Good job, trusting me like a good boy. So relaxed, and so hungry,” she smiled.

He let go of her hips to caress her neck as she thrust a bit faster, keeping control through an orgasm as she did so. She gripped his thigh tight and kept going at the same pace.

“Your whole face lights up,” she panted, “when you do something good. When you take care of me. Do you know that? You just wanna make me happy. You just want to make people happy. You’re so tender-hearted, baby.”

He unclenched both hands, groaning through gritted teeth, and he got that look in his eye. Nat knew. There was aroused James, and then there was viscerally hungry James. Vulnerable James. Right-where-Nat-wanted-him James.

She licked her hand and reached for his cock and did a gentler twist, down and up over the head.

“You take such good care of me. That’s it, good boy.”

His eyes rolled up, and his back went into a deep arch. He jerked in his bionic arm, keeping it curled tight across his chest - a sure sign he felt very little control over his body. If he wasn’t capable of much else, he’d keep all the attention he had on that arm and what it was doing. Yet he flailed with the other arm, still trying to reach for her as a powerful orgasm grabbed him and didn’t let go.

He threw back his head and gave a full-throated, ecstatic shout. Soon he began spurting all over her hand and both of their chests.

As he came, she neared another peak herself - this one stronger than the last. She worked harder and harder to keep her own hand and hips steady to prolong his orgasm as long as possible. The harnesses’ pressure against her clit again erupted into shivers and surges of pleasure through her. This time she bent and twisted her back, and groaned deeply. But she kept control, and kept his sensations just as she wanted them to be.

He gasped and moaned and throbbed and pulsed… on and on until they were both finally spent.

He slowly became still. When she trusted herself to move, Nat gently shifted herself out of him. She opened two quick releases on the back of the harness and slipped out of it.

With the harness gone, she could more easily curl up next to him and cradle his limp form.

“Ohhhhh, oh good,” she said. “Good. Good boy, good job.” She still fought to catch her own breath.

His unfocused eyes looked for her, and he smiled and seemed to search for words.

“... fuck,” he finally said.

“Yes.”

“Fuck, that was good, Natalia,” he slurred.

“Yes, good.”

“Fuck.”

“Uh-huh.”

“You… you sound like you came.”

“I did.”

“Yaay,” he said with quiet enthusiasm.

She chuckled. “Are you doing okay?” she asked.

“I…” he drew out the sound several seconds. “I am. I am yes.”

She chuckled and shifted to run her fingers through his hair. “You are yes?”

“Yes.”

“You’re such a good boy, baby. Do you know that?”

“Guh,” he said, and he curled into her.

“So good.”

Nat got comfortable.

Then she looked at James’ quiet form, in repose, now tangled with hers. She listened to his breathing return to normal after all her affecting him, guiding him, making him feel things. She loved all of it.

And she felt her heart laid bare next to her. She could almost cry.

She laid her cheek against his hair and just breathed him in a while.

They laid there, entwined, for a few minutes.

Then he lifted his head and looked around groggily.

“Need drink. Where…” He trailed off.

Nat realized the drinks were missing. She climbed reluctantly out of bed, making a detour into the bathroom to get them warm washcloths. She handed him his and used her own as she searched the bedroom for their drinks. She finally retrieved the bottles from where he’d unceremoniously dropped them on the floor. He was pulling himself up to a sitting position as she climbed back in next to him and handed him a bottle.

“So is taking it up the ass gonna make be a better Captain America?” he asked, wiping himself down.

“Excuse me?”

“Wasn’t that your point?” he grinned.

Nat side-eyed him as she cuddled close. “You’re high.”

“Of course I am, you’re touching me,” he gave her his heartfelt, ridiculously lovesick look.

“Oh my. What am I gonna do with you?”

He smiled drunkenly and sipped his electrolytes.

She decided it was time to take a page from Steve’s book. She turned to face him squarely.

“James,” she directed.

He noticed the gravity of her tone and turned to give his attention.

“I’m very proud of you. The people who matter are very proud of you.”

He held her gaze and looked like he was trying to absorb what she was saying.

“How do you feel about what you’re doing?” she asked. “How do you really feel about it?”

James looked to the side, his eyes focused far away. He took another swig, and thought some more. Finally he nodded and turned to her.

“Nothing makes up for what I’ve done. But this…” He looked over his shoulder, in the vague direction of the shield he dropped in the hall.

“I make a difference,” he said. “I give back. To the world. To Steve.” He met her gaze. “To you.”

“Then you’ve got my support in that, James. Always.”

The edges of his mouth curled up.

“Do you know that?” she asked.

He nodded. Then he spoke.

“What do you get out of this?”

“Out of what?”

“Helping me do this.”

“Oh, nothing,” she offered cheerfully, “I’m a martyr. Haven’t you noticed?”

He raised his eyebrows at her sudden evasion.

“It’s getting chilly in here and we’re behind on our Netflix queue. Bring that blanket over here and let’s get cozy.”

He got up to do as he was told. Nat shifted pillows around the way she knew he’d want them, and got in position to wrap her arms around him. She wanted to dote on him a bit longer.

He brought back the blanket she requested, and a favorite sweatshirt of hers to boot. He sat where he was instructed to, and they got settled.

“I watched two episodes without you,” he explained as he began queueing up his latest sci-fi show. “Do you want me to backtrack?”

“No, I’ll catch up. Pick up where you left off.”

She took his free hand in hers.

“You didn’t answer my other question, Nat.” He looked down at their entwined hands.

She peered at him. He looked worried.

“I get a James with some peace in him. That’s important to me.”

She leaned into him for a kiss. He offered his scratchy cheek, and then his soft lips. As their lips parted again, she held his head in close, caressing his hair again as she did so. He met her eyes with a purpose, with a hint of that intent of serious mischief behind his current languid mood.

She closed her eyes and just held him close, smelling and touching and still tasting him.

They cuddled closer and started the next episode.


End file.
